My deep thoughts are running wild today. Had a hard time falling asleep last night. I have been dreaming again, about what limits I can push myself to. How far can I go? What am I capable of? Can I do it? I get big ideas. I mean really BIG ideas and I usually think I can accomplish them. Fortunately, I have an anchor named Bruce that keeps me from floating of into space with my big ideas. He means well and unfortunately is usually right about how not feasible my ideas are. Am I delusional?

But lately, I have been dreaming again about what is and is not acceptable. What am I willing to sacrifice to do something I really think I can and want to do? Is the alternative to not doing it acceptable? I don't know. I am wading into deep waters here with this dream and really don't know how to swim in this ocean. I have some basic ideas but the thought of total commitment is terrifying!!!!!!! There are sharks in the water and lots of other scary creatures.

Can I handle it? Are my dreams too big for me? I have never thought of myself as someone who had limits. I pretty much assumed I could do anything I decided to do. I guess it is never a good idea to assume anything!

So, what are my limits? Can I do anything I set my mind to? Should I try? The thought of not trying breaks my heart and I don't think that is an acceptable alternative!

Busy, busy, busy....

I have so much to do today that I don't know where to start. I (thankfully) have several flower orders to make and ship, need to make dinner, spend time with the fam and ...I don't even know what else.

AHHHHHHHHGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!

Deep thoughts?

Ahhhhhhhhh! A place to share my thoughts. Hmmm. How many people will even read this? I don't know that I care, I just like the idea of being able to type as I think and have it show up somewhere is kind of cool. I guess in some ways I have always been a bit of an exhibitionist, wanting everyone to know what I think, etc.

I guess the first thing I want to blog about is God! He is awesome (lame word, I know, but it should realy only be ascribed to HIM.) Actually, what word used to describe God would not be lame? It is impossible to accurately and entirely capture His essence with human language. People have been trying to do so since the beginning of time and it cannot be done. So why do I think I should try...it's probably just more noise in the chaos? I guess it is kind of selfish, I just need to!

Anyway, I was thinking the other day about God and how He loves us. Why He loves us and what that means. I don't know! And I can't begin to grasp how great His love is for us, me. all I know is that I come across people who don't have the slightest idea and it breaks my heart. I think the most basic need of human beings is love. Forget food, shelter and all that stuff. We need that but the human soul, the human spirit cannot survive without love. That is why people do some of the crazy stuff they do, they are looking to at least feel like they are loved by someone. The amazing truth is that they are and they don't know it. Either they have heard it and don't get it or they haven't really heard it. What am I telling people about how God loves them? Am I giving them rules to follow to figure it out or am I showing them how He sees them and loves them desparately! I hope that the later is true, that when I talk about God that people see how much He loves them, just as they are!

I think I figured it out!

Hah! I think I figured it out, why my first post is not showing up. Blogspot is on Pacific time and I am on Eastern Daylight Savings time (duh) and I scheduled the post for 11:19 am, but that is about 3 hours from now according to blogspot! So come back later and see what deep thoughts I shared 3 hours ago, now...then?!

How deep are my thoughts?

Apparently not very! I don't seem to know how to publish my blog.